Just now..i just watch some touching video..http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#!/video/video.php?v=1219994465851&ref=mf


and suddenly think about Life..
there is a things that always cause never ending explanation in my Life..


My Favorite topic that i had in this Life is " LIFE " itself


People out there talk and Discuss about Self, Experience, Money, and  Love...


But what about "LIFE"?
What do you think about Life ?
What is the meaning Of Life ? 
Who Are You?
Who Am I?
Dream or Real?
are you exist for me?
am i Exist for you?
are you Real?
This tree, wind, water, is this for real?
is this story had arranged for me?

WHO THE HELL is GOD?




this is the most  tough question and nobody dare to think..

In this Life..
We ( Human ) had think that we are the  King..
because there are nothing can be better than us ( Human )


We are the one who rule this world..
We can   Love, Kill,  Hurt,  Hate..

Nobody can tell us what we want...
We create our own Rule, and wish everybody afraid of that..


We are the one who control our self..

What I want is MINE..


Human always used to be think that we are the Only People in this World..

Everything exist is for People..

We think whatever land that we land is our Land..

We Only think that we think is right..


Everyone need to be kneel down in front of us..

Let me tell you about my Childhood point of view..
When i was 11 maybe..
maybe in junior high school, or maybe in kinder garden..


i was starting to think about Life..in my mind that time..
Life is so Mystery...
i even think that..i am the only one who born and realize everything in this earth..
people around me have no feeling..they exist is just for me..
people i met..all is had arranged ..
after  i am going home..they are disappear..and then appears again like everything is normal..
and i need to pretend nothing happen to make this game run smoothly..


I think this life as a Video game.. 
which i am the main Hero..and Someone created everything for me..

When people smile at me..i am Happy..
when people mad at me.. I am Sad..
and i think that aa.. i need to meet this things..and that things..



When i am doing good people will praise me..
when doing bad people will  think bad about me..


have Fight when angry..


until slowly growing up..
that kind of though
 is slowly fading..


but i wonder how i can still remember that things right now haha




This Life is unique huh?nobody dare to ask about how this earth is born..
and refuse to answer it..because no body know..

Like this Earth will be destroyed or maybe break the balance of this life if the answered had  revealed out..


but i don't want to talk about how this earth  exist...


I Just like to talk about Life..


We as Human being..sometimes acting weird and unique..
We have 3 mood in this Life :
Good, Balance , Bad..


We Change unpredictable..


When it good..all is Okay from our selves..
and when it turn Bad .. Okay will turn become Not Okay..

Balance Mood is something that  I call the moment where we just do every responsibility that we have in our daily Life..Our Mind focus at  what are we doing..and the moment we didn't talk to ourselves like " hey how are you doing " , " wahhh what a nice weather " and so on..


if something unlucky Hit us during the Good mood..
Sometimes it will stay cool and turn become Balance Mood...


But During Balance Mood..if we get Hit by unlucky things..it sure will turn become Bad Mood..


everything bad Happen always take down one level of our Mood..
and so do the opposite things..


but there are also some weird Human Being..
who can raise one level of their mood what ever bad things happen to them..
haha





Human Being tend to have a million complicated mind.
and it can be change easily with Greed or self esteem..
almost of us change by a Greed and Ignorance..

That's what people need to do to survive..this is what people used to think..
There is no need to think about any theory of Life...just focus in Reality Life.. because Life is keep changing..This is also what people think about.. 

this is Human Being..They always refuse to follow their heart..
Human always follow what looks good.. 
We tend to be stay at status ..

maybe if someday God is going to fishing at one beautiful Sea called " Earth "
there are beautiful, funny and unique Fish called " Human "


God Put some bait and the fish follow  whenever the bait go...
and then we been put into Aquarium, to be enjoyed..


This is us..
we Human Being born into this earth..we Life and follow everything that people do..
We Follow the Dream that people Dream.. we tend to follow the same step to reach one place..


we all search for Happiness..but we all do not know what is the Happiness actually that we Search...

People said yes that is Happiness, and we also said..yes it is...



until one day.. something called " Money " exist in this Earth..

and i think Money is now become THE KING of this Life..even a GOD


It is Ruling this earth..
It is controlling all Human Being..
hahaha ( Seriously )

Now human being used to think.."  Life needs Money and Life for Money "
can anybody imagine actually how foolish is us?
we born in this earth..
we are growing up..and at the last..we are nothing and meaningless than a piece of paper that we called " Money "


Maybe someday we need to change our Status..
Human become Money
 Money Become Human..


so we change place..

Is that Okay Money Being?


Life is sure unique...have a different story from each people..
we Life and Die in this earth..
but nobody can find this simple question..


People lately said..
" We Life for Food "


What is the function of the Food actually?


we eat and Survive..


we survive and protect people we loved..
yeah that's right..this is also what i am thinking about..stay alive to be a long people we loved..and enjoy this life..
we do our responsibility..

and die Happily at the last...

but people is tend to be foolish..for staying alive they hurt people around them..  

What is Happiness?
What is the reason i exist?
For What?
Who Am I?



because nobody can ever explain it..
so people decide to ignore it...
and better we just do what people do..


yeah..this is Foolish Human Being..
we born exactly just to Follow what people do..
we afraid what people afraid..
we ignore what people ignore..
although they have heart to feel what is Happiness actually..

But Human do not know how to feel it..




and then something called Religion is come to this world..

In This Life..people have a religion to follow..
Because people think that Religion can bring peace in mind and Happiness..
some is asking..maybe with religion i can know what is the reason for me to Live..
and what is the meaning of Life...

some is seems understand it..but do not know how to explain it..
some believe with that ..

and some is believe..only Money can bring Happiness in this Life..


but right now i don't discuss about Money and Religion..


let's back to the Life..
Life is surely mystery..
sometimes create Miracle..
sometimes it tell us the answer and suddenly make us confuse again..
sometimes we feel like know the reason to Life..and then we Confuse again..
sometimes sad..sometimes Happy..


Life is surely always make people confuse where to walk and what to do..





Earth Exist , 
and we human being . and all Creature enjoy inside it..
Different House, Family, Story, Appearance..


" Appearance " i wonder unaccountable of people population in this earth  , but how come everybody have different face ?
hmm
what a mystery right? haaha




Yeah..Do you believe in Ghost?

is that really exist or just human creation?


haha see..in this earth actually is not only us who life..
but it also belong to everybody..
but you know...this is what God Called us " Foolish Human Being.."
We always think that we own this place..
fight for self esteem, try to compare with another..

Maybe God up there is laughing at us..
and enjoy our foolish Story..
maybe God with his/her Friends is enjoying popcorn and sitting on the comfort  couch..
like watching a Soccer competition..
shouting , angry and Happy..
maybe gambling ..." hey which fish will be the winner ? "
and the fish keep fighting biting each other..


God said to his Friend " you know..that human are damn Stupid..
i grant them power , feeling , Mind to Live Happily..
but they don't know how to control all of the things that i gave.....
they do everything to be number one..
they use it for cheating, betray and hurt each other..


I gave them Heart to feel and understand what is Happiness..
But they do not want to feel it..
i gave them power to stand up..but they give up easily..
I give them mind,so they can learn.. but they don't want to learn..





yeah that is us..
Human Being..


Life is sure Unique, and Full of Mystery hoho  

But i Believe in something..
that this Life is have a lot of things that we don't know..
a lot of Life exist..
not only us...
Tree, Animal and Earth..
also have Life..feeling, they can cry and afraid of dead..
but us as Human Being ignore to listen it..
and have a statement that everything is only for Me ( Human )




hmm yeah,,that is..
enough for tonight about LIFE that cause confusing if we think about it..






Love Me ..
Rong Lee

Hey..
Today is 22 August 2010
and that is my Birthday..

Which i was started remember at Saturday at 00.00 by Doctor Tanaka...the first person who greet me very ontime..
ck ck ck He Sure Love me a lot i think ( HAHAHAHAHA.... )

Before that My Friend Nova who can't do Lie..( you are too honest to Lie haha)
at Saturday 18.00 after doing gym and reached home..
She sent Message like this " President! Giam Tiong ( Terrible ) tomorrow the speaker suddenly can't doing speech because of family problem..and you had been asked to be speaker..remember bring the Uniform! "

Hahaha Do you know how can i feel weird?
in my mind " hmm..usually she is going to call me and ask can i become a speaker? but right now she decide it without tell me who is the one who asked me to become speaker..and The message sounds so over urgent..
it more effected if she send it at 22.00 at night haha"

but that time .. i am still relax..i feel .."aa it's okay if i am doing speech.." because i am feeling in mood that time..hoho

until Tanaka send greeting at me..my mind started to think " o i see..Tomorrow is My birthday .."
Is there anything will Happen i think?
 suddenly link to her message and weird message reply..haha
" aa don't think too much.. " at least i feel in mood to prepare speech..until 01.30 a.m

until in the morning..i know that something really weird haha
when i send message to her.." eh Nova..would you mind to change my chanting section with someone else..because i need to prepare my speech more.."
she replied this " You Need to bring Hai Ching Manyi ! Thanks.."( sound very pushing right? ) haha

at the last my mom asked..are you doing speech this morning?
Me : yes i do..
Mom : How come..last night i met the speaker and she said she will doing speech for sure..

hahaha that time i completely know they plan something haha
and i send message to Nova : The Speaker can do speech..hoho
and i believe after i sent that message she is totally confuse how to reply me hahahaha

I wonder is she the one who being stress at the last.. hahaha
ya..at least i had prepared everything..
so i just..come and be ready hahaha

it's My Birthday! i want to do everything! and do not want to expect too much hahaha
haha
although during Sunday class i accept little warning because i just know that we need to finish before 11.am, which i don't know.. ( people said being scorned in special day is damn Unlucky hahaha, but i am so steady) hahaha

After Sunday Class over..everybody went home seems so busy..and i have a long chat with members..
until remain Jackson, Juandy, Christian Salim and Robin ( the one who request playing Plays station at my Home, who at last he didn't play anything.. only do hugging making mess my room..hahaa)

we had lunch..by buying 2 Pizza medium size.. and main course.. some is Vegetarian Fussili , Spaggethi, Chicken Teriyaki,  Sour Fish..
and 3 Dogs Balloon from Pizza for souvenir..which the last become a decoration for our lunch..
we ate inside my small room..

" aaa this is my birthday party for this year..hahaha " i like it..
so simple, relax, and have different warm room situation hahaha 
nice than celebrate at Restaurant or Cafe ! haha

with ghost movie in my note book, that make Mr Robin keep closing his eyes and hugging everyone..
( that monkey never stop hugging a men Hauahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah )
I fall a sleep for 15 minutes i think..and found that..like to go somewhere because they will feel boring haahaha

and surprisingly..another friends Hendra, Christian Salim , SURYAAAA!
is waiting at me in front of my home..

HAHA at that time to be honest i feel happy ( oh yeahhh ) although i didn't act shocked..but it surprising me haha
exspecially found Surya is also coming hahahaa

You know the moment..it kinda like.. you having a great mood, weather..calm and warm condition..and when you ready to step outside to having another great moment.. finally a lot of Angel say hi to you..and suddenly you feel like today is going to be fun day..like time is stopping for you..ahaha

inside the car..i feel spirited..keep singing..and feel like stand out the window and say hi to the world! hahahaha

we planed to went to having badminton and drink some coffee inside my room before..but suddenly jackson seems head to Sun Plaza..
at that time..i said aaa so you planed  everything..
no wonder he keep messaging and smiling alone silently  inside my room..and cover it with reading comic book
ck ck ck ck...

at this moment Hendra Move from Surya car to Jackson Car..and he started to try take off my shirt..
especially Hendra and Robin ( they always being so gay hahaha )

yeah this time i allowed them to be happy for being success bully me..hahaha
a bunch of monkey had waiting in Sun...ahahaha they all steal my belonging..
They steal my 1 Long White shirt, green t shirt...and try to steal my pride..
gather power to beat me...so lame ...


I am Lucky for having experience for being Short Monastic retreat..
because i was walking inside Sun Plaza during the crowded day with my inner t-shirt...and it suppose wear during sleep and doing my gym..i can said it for a dirty activity one..

they leave me inside the toilet..at that time i set my mind inside the toilet.." okay..think as a monastic.." simple and no attachment Hahahahahaha
and it saved me...at the last i seems to be cool hahaha
until That Riki Wirawan come...and playing harsh to open the remaining t shirt on my body..and the last he Tears my Shirt!!!

You are so dead in your next Birthday Buddy!! ahahahaha

that time i can't act no attachment anymore..because it is too sexy in Lebaran hahaha

                        Mereka bisa batal Puasa nanti... Sungguh Dosaa

but i feel wrong because i also make his new expensive t shirt a little bit messy .. hahaha

i walk with that shirt ..by hosting Hendra to cover my Body..
until i got a present by let them adoring my self..
haha

they all keep attacking my weakness by never wear a short pants..
and they pushed me to wear it today..
can you imagine that..wearing syal in Medan..will looks like a clown in people eyes..

everybody is looking at me..
i don't know what people think about myself..
is that looking at handsome guys or disgusting guys..
haahaha
but what you can do..at least i only can act like a Korean..
ehmm  Anyong Haseyo hahaha
 



nice2..
i never imagine i damn so patient today hahahaa



to be honest Diary..
i am damn happy..Today is my day...
and Everybody is gathering..
and have fun..
i wonder there is a long time i miss this moment where everybody gathering..and have a same vision to do Harassment ( Hahaha just kidding , i mean to bully a birthday person..) "Please don't try this at Home!"
At Least for one day they spare time to gather..and wishing Happy Birthday..
haha
something that i didn't expect before..
you know..everyday seem time is not enough to be used..more older more less time to fooling around haha..

sometimes also when people decide to go..it's hard to come back..
some is do not want to come back..some is do not know how to come back..
But when after he/she go and come back.. sometimes it will become eternity.." that's what people said "

I Have a friend who have a same condition with me.. there is Silvia Winny..
She has birthday yesterday.. but celebrate today haha 2 in 1 huh..

i am not making this sound big and add some spicy..but this is the first time i said to the world..
This is the best birthday feeling that i ever had...
today seems so nature..and  have feeling of Forgiveness

Guys..in your Birthday Party.. I suggest you..do not expect too much.. but start it with a grateful heart..
at that time we can feel so Happy..hahaha
The Feeling where everything so nature...simple but deep inside my heart..

Hey this is the best...
Sorry for making you guys tired haha..

i wonder how can give this feeling in others birthday..
I wish you will understand how i feel in your birthday someday.and continue by sharing it...

hahaha What a Day!



Rong Lee

Continue..from the Chapter 1 :Of being Monastic..

Chapter 2 - I realized how lucky I am --

First Day and First Dinner..
In Fo Guang Shan actually they don't have dinner in a monastic ( monk ) life..
They called it an medicine to regenerate our body.. for Monastic who doing hard Work a whole day..

Yeah..
Monastic in Fo Guang Shan always being busy..
Looking at them tell me about real Life..

Life always need to work, that  give us an experience and the meaning of Life.. For a long time a lot of people think being monastic is because lazy to work..stay safe, hiding by a name..
but actually they are totally wrong..

I can see.. someone who can become a monastic is a special one and stronger than a lay person like us..
we said they are lazy, actually they working hard than us...

they also talented, and skillful, full in understanding the experience of life..
They understand about Life, Human Being even themselves..

Yeah this is Human Being..
including myself..sometimes we think are clever than others.. the best after we can handle in one things, we show out all our arrogance and wealth..
but sometimes we do not know that we are weaker inside..

we didn't realize we are being controlled by Life..
being fooled of praise from people, and suddenly controlled by status..

Join this monastery retreat at the first day, and the second day.. i feel very uncomfortable..
i quite miss my home, Food actually..
right here we have no time for taking a bath, not enough time to sleep, always stay mindfulness, no Lazy things..no efficient , no adoring yourselves.. and no additional food at night..

in my daily Life, especially Indonesian..
is too lucky..we are staying with family, have anything to eat, being covered and protected, everything had been prepared for us..
we can do anything that we want,
like an example, eating together in one table, having a joke,chat, eating and in a same time watching television..
we drink when we want..we put sauce and everything as we want.. no waiting just have everything that we want..

But when i was sitting at DINING HALL as a monastic..
it was a really unique style to eat ...

I was sitting and Looking around--
there are around 1000 monk sitting quietly waiting for a meal..

All i can see is people have a same cloth ,( monk uniform ) , same behavior, same hair style ( No Hair ),
no make up..

I even realized..everytime before we start to have our meal..
there is always a bird files inside the dining hall..haha

I watch to everyone expression..
all is same...
everybody is focusing in one view..when i was looking around..
suddenly my Teacher come and said to me..

Not to look around... " Keep your Eyes !, Do not too much action, Sit properly... Do not Lay your Back! Sit Half your chair! "

at that time i keep asking myself..
Why there is no smile and so quiet..?
Why i can't look around..and enjoy the moment?
All i can hear is only the sound of Chop Stick.. ting tiang ting tiang..

What an unique moment..
But after day by day..i'm starting to understand why there is so much rule in eating our meal?
that actually teach me for being patient..
For this long time I always want everything coming Fast..
but now i learned to wait for each other..

I was always like to looking around..
But now i need to focus in one things why?

That teaches me..to control myself and mind..

Eating with a lot of mind will cause  stress you know.. haha
that's why my Mother always said to me..
when you eat..go to eat..
when you sleep go to sleep..
do not bring other mind to disturb it..


There is a rule in moving our bowl and plate... I wonder why?
but now i realized it is to keep my mind concious..
This is one of my mind weakness actually..
sometimes if too much things we need to do in our daily Life.., We can forget and ignore a simple things and the last all was messed up..

one day in my Lunch..because i was too focus in moving my bowl and plate..
i forgot to take inside my fruit and Yogurt..
and at the last..it was taken by the Xin Thang ( people who volunteer to serve meal )..

at that time i keep mourning about that Sweet and delicious Yogurt and Fruit..
I wish the Xin Thang will bring back to me again..
haha

but after a minute.. i realized why i need to have this disastifaction in my mind?
i don't want to have a bad mood in having my meal because of that Yogurt and Fruit..
at the last i finished my meal, and that SWEET things never come  back to me..haha
so my conclusion there is a useless things if we keep sad for a whole life by something that had passed..

This is Human Being..
always being attach ( melekat ) with something we haven't have and we don't have.., being  greed for something but never enjoy what we have right now..
after having one thing we haven't enjoy and use it well yet..but we start to think having another new again..
that is the one always cause dissatisfaction , jealous and stress in our daily life hoho
 

Nice Lesson for me today..
thank you for this moment..



There are 3 Chapter Left to go ....
Coming Soon --
 
Stay strong and Love Me..
Rong Lee..

hey diary..
this is like a dream..
tomorrow i am going to fly to Taiwan Fo Guang Shan..

last week..at 24 - 27 June 2010
I just have a spectacular event with Yaders at lovely Xiang Shan Shi..

Committees all is damn tired..
can you imagine..
not 2 and 3 hours for 4 days..plus Never ended spirit in the morning..
Eat Fast..and need big focus..

this activity is really suck my whole energy..
but who knows we make it..
the sacrifices..makes all members feel convenient..

this Harmonize Camp bring me a lot of memories..
the answer that i seek for this year came out..

yeah.. i can't tell you right now..what is the answer.. because i need to make sure and do analysis first..

in this activity .. the first time BLIA YAD offer a responsible for members to become a group leader..
all of them is awesome..
looking at them give me a picture how me and all committees looks like when the first time stand up in BLIA YAD..
looking at them..i can see how big people can change..
i joined BLIA YAD for 7 years.. and i really do feel i had change a lot..
of course not all is change better..like myself..
some part i trust i change better..
some part i realize i can forget something important..

to be honest..everybody had changed..no exception..
the feeling.. the way people think.. the point of view change a lot..
sometimes we can say that is better..sometimes people can said that is worse..

looking at all members and Leaders.. make me realized how simple are we.. long long time a go..
and how far we had changed ..

i realized how hard someone to be simple..when i looked at them i said to myself..
i like to be simple..and pure to see this life..
and to be honest its quite difficult..
but i believe everything have the time..

this is human being..
sometimes we think we had changed so good..
we think we are smart..when we can handle a several case..
we think we have the biggest experience after we success in one case..
but sometimes there are something we had forgot..
the small part which the most important one..
and at that time we realize.." aaa.. this is not what i want.."

i learned something today.."not all perfect things is always good for everybody .."
like myself..sometimes i try to be perfect in everybody's eyes ..
i like to create a very perfect system..
i want people to be proud at me..
i want to exist when people really need me..
i want to be strong and strong and strong..

but sometimes it not means always have good result..
too perfect not always give us happiness..

i think sometimes this life not complete without problem and
without weakness..
we can felt like..everything just alright..
nothing to fix..nothing to learn..

sometime after we passed a lot of problem and experience.. mind pushed us to be stronger and stronger...
try to think different..
try to do different..and change our point of view..

at that moment we can think this is good..yeahh we becoming mature and mature..

but sometimes we didn't realize we had changed and control by Ego and Life..
and Harmonize will slowly hard to get..in our life..because we forgot to think simple.. haha
this what i think.. To be simple..

Tomorrow is the day...
The Day where i need to fight my self..
and try to accept myself more..

Appearance, Name is a weakness that always attacking people including myself..
i like to beat down that weakness..

tonight i just cut my hair into 1 cm..

haha
it needs a big courage actually for me haha..
right here i can know..appearance is also my priority haha

but now..i believe..personality is more important than appearence..
appearance will become a stress for us..and become our weakness..

at 4 July 2010..
i will totally become a monk..with a bald head...

people will think i am an alien..( maybe )
but now..i'm ready for it..
i talk to my self..
and i like to prove to myself..
 " hey this is me "
" Rong Lee " the real me..

i am going to  sleep now..
tomorrow will be a good day..and nice experience for me..
To be continue..

i got a new story today...

right now..my heart is full of anger..
I am mad..
This mind do not know..what is right what is wrong..
Good people in front me , i do not know he/she is good or no..
it seems silently attacking my trust and Dream..

i feel like to beat every single enemy in front of me..
there is something i need to save..
there is something i need to change..
in this moment i wish to be stronger..

right now.. i feel like nothing to care..
just about the rightness..
i feel something is hiding...something not humble enough..
something i don't see..

this eyes look deeper and deeper..
more mature i understand what is in people mind.. and how greedy are they..

a lot of things to see..
something that i shouldn't see, write down in my mind..

Who is a good people?
right now i just know..good people is myself..

Right now i want a rightness..
Who should i trust?

I do not trust in what people said..
i trust in people action...

I trust in True Men...
the one who walk he/she talk..

I don't trust people by Dharma Speech , i trust on people behavior..
I trust in Karma..
I trust that i can't just pretending it's okay..
I trust i am not stupid..
I trust there is a time where i need to trust myself..
I trust i shouldn't do what i don't like people do to me..
I trust i can't depend too much on anybody..
i trust that i need to take action if there is something wrong..
I trust i need to change if i have the reason to change
I trust i can't just listen what people said..if they tell something unreasonable..
I trust if People Love Me... They Trust Me..
I trust if i Love people.. I trust them..
I trust that i always respect someone who can respect them self
I trust i need to be Stronger to tell the rightness
I trust i need to be brave and not discrimination to change the World..
I trust people can't live without trust..
I trust not all people have a same mind..
I trust people have their own way to Happiness..
I trust everything will be back to normal..
I trust people can't live with any regrets..
I Trust everybody should feel sorry if hurt people unreasonably


I had controlled by Anger..
I am Mad..
right now i trust nobody..
Right now my self is my own teacher..
because out there no body that i can trust..
only a bunch of people who protect they self esteem and Name..
only a bunch of people who care for own feeling..


they don't have trust like the way i trust them..



Who should i trust ?
I should trust my trust..



tonight i just mumbling a lot..
to describe what we are think when our trust was being attacked..

when we can't just sit silently..


Is this good or not?
we can learn from here..
as long we fight for the right..
no discrimination..

Hey..this experience is the first time in my life..
This is small part of my story ...
Today I woke up on 02.00 ..honestly that is the time I am going to bed usually.. But now is the time to wake up.. What the hell!!


Myself, Jackson, Vincent I, Vincent II ( Tourguide ) , Juandy zhu...
in the morning our guide were being too serious, but I know he make sure everything prepared well, He pushed us to make our stomach really full so we are going to have power to do the hiking. Although in the first time is a little bit annoying when we have a half consciousness and being rushed, but we should thanks to him so everything were run so well, because we need to be
dicipline and strong commitment in order to reach the top of our life ( Mountain ) 
especially for us who are really beginner, being too weak or spoil only will make us failed to achieve everything in our life.

Okay, We are ready to go.. This is our adventure..
Land was so dark with only a light from car we entered a road to deep forest
at that moment mind was tend to think unnecessary to boost up our adrenaline about appearing some Zombie or Ghost
hahaha

can you imagine that?( do not think )





yep time showed at  04.00 we were starting to walk..
it were very difficult in the first time, got tired so easily but get used after we walked further..

you know brother, the Guide ever said to us about his experience
in that moment when we do hiking, we always can know whether our friend is really your true friend or not, by looking that our friends will leave us behind or get along during the hard journey to the top.


I think that is so true..
with my experience.. We can't decide someone is our best friend when they always there during a party, hanging up to have fun or good in making a funny joke or maybe praise you when he/she is in happy condition. Infact, we can say someone is really our best friend, when they are really there for us when we are in a very busy and stress moment, because at that moment we can know that our friend is really grabbing our hand to move forward together, does he or she appears when you need help? or only need you when he/she needs you.




this is the first time i did hiking -- and i wished can see the sun rises up there...
i want to tell the Mr Sun up there and shout  " Hey You! i am Exist Here!"

When i post a shout out at my Facebook, my friend comment something weird.. he said 

" standing at the top of the world doesn't give you anything, sometimes means we avoid something"


actually i didn't really sure what is the message that he want to tell, but i know he is in discourage condition and stuck right now.



For me only a coward who doesn't dare to stand at top of the world, because being at top is making yourself ready to be measured by a person who is under you, If we really worth it, we can inspire or being a new hope for a lot of people, but if we are not worth it, that top of the mountain will become a nightmare for you. That's why only man who doesn't want to take responsibility and have a dream protect they will choose to hide inside the hole, complaining other and wish for happiness which never granted. 

During the journey the weather was getting colder so we stopped at some spot to had a break and refilled our stomach with some snack. We made small fire from rubies and it feels warm and good. We were starting to get close to Vincent II. We broke the strangers feeling and starting to have a joke for each other.
He said he is starting to admire us, because from the beginning he tough we were such a lame and weakling. He just doesn't know that we can make everything Possible lol




there is something funny happened..
about my friend " Juandy "
we already get along since in school, and being a classmate for such along time


He ever said to me that he afraid of Highness in school before..
during the journey he didn't complain at all beside just being tired a little bit, because i know he didn't get enough sleep in a whole week.

but you know, when we walked further and more higher and higher. Feeling like we can start to touch the sky and when the mind tend starting to think " what will happen if we fall? " ( Do not think ) 


only one level to go..
He starts talking a lot and asked not to walk further. In that time i think he was already tired.


But because all of us wish to stand at the top.. to enjoy sunrises..
he were shaking and at that time. He said.. " ohh noo.. i can't!!! I am afraid of High"
that time i remembered " aaaaaa yeah he got that syndrome "


Can you imagine how long he kept that until the last spot?





















We all decide not to pushed him so we decide together to leave him at the safe spot and he wait at us there.. Actually we should grab his hand and reached the top together, because the top is already so close, so he can really experience being at the top of the world.


and then TADAA!!!!
we reached the top!!!!
but how unlucky hmm hmm
a lot of mist covered the sun...
Damnn!


but the view is AWESOME!!!
it looks like a Heaven, all you can see is sky and mountain, the mountain looks like an island and the cloud is like the ocean so you can see a whole new world up there. At that moment my mind tend to think if only i can fly.
( too much watching Movie )

















Brother, sometimes maybe we can have a mind about how stupid to do this dangerous hiking things. Putting our life in a dangerous mountain, climbing at a very risky area..
and one mistake can probably caused you a life.
In the first time i think about all of this, but if we do it without thinking any unnecessary thought, the fact it's not that hard and scary like we think.




right here i learned something   " Just Do it "


too much considering sometimes just can stop us to walk forward..
Life is difficult when we too focus on what will be our temptation but not the goal.
Because if you think about the problem, sometimes it will reduces your determination, but if you focus on the goal you will stop to think that there are hard temptation in your life.

































that is fun..i wish someday i can meet with the sun without mist..
that's all about this journey..
Thank you for the great day..






Stay Strong
Rong Lee

Yesterday is a Waisak Day..
I have Bazaar in Tiara with all my Friends, everybody is damn tired.. so do i.. the day before i can't sleep and need to stand up a whole day and have no appetite to have any lunch..
this morning i was woke up on 09.30
and this body almost can't get up from my bed...
with energy like zombie to wake up..( half alive half dead )

i went to Studio .. right there i didn't do anything because i was like a Zombie..

with an empty stomach..i am sitting and lay down...waiting for my friend come to do some printing stuff..but they didn't appear and finally i found that they have changing plan in location..
so i think they already can help themselves..and i am sitting at Studio and acting like a Zombie..

you know what i am doing...
i was writing...
and write a stupid questions...about " a Man who have no energy "
i write this question :
"  What will you do if you want to do something but you don't know what to do?
What Will you do if you want to do something but you don't have any energy to do something?
What will you do if you want to Sleep but there are no bed for you to sleep?
What will you do if you want to sleep but you can't sleep?
What will you do if you want to sleep but you shouldn't sleep?
what will you do if you are hungry but there is no food to eat?
What will you do if you are hungry but you have no energy to find some food?
What will you do if you are writing something but you don't know what to write?
What will you do if you want to do useful things but now you don't know what is the useful things?"


haha i wrote this question because that is what i feel when i "half life half dead "at that morning..


Now i am at Berastagi..
and we are coming a mysterious guest at 22.00
his name is Vincent ( a same name with one of my friend )

He will lead us to climb a mountain of Sibayak..
and enjoy sunrises..

he comes out with a little bit arrogant when speaking..but looks like he care and really aware of our safety hahaha
He looks got a big courage but he lacks of manner..
look wild as his status as an Nature adventure hoho

tomorrow i am going to wake up on 03.30 and start the adventure..
this is the first experience to watch a sun raise..
wish no rain is coming ..


aa it seems we just  can sleep for 3 hours..
good night

Stay Strong
Rong Lee

hello Diary..
some people said to me..
i am a mysterious man? i wonder " am i really like that?"
i ever having some test in some physicology test and some question really told me.. i am a kind of mysterious person, which always bring people around me curious to know further about myself..


i wonder is that really i am so mysterious?
hmm.. i have no idea actually...
for me..all people actually is also Mysterious..
haha..
some is more mysterious than myself i think..
can we really predict people behavior from the first time we met?
i don't think so..

about knowing well the people around us..
i think the first things we need to do actually is  "To Love Them"
if we don't love some people..we never can understand the way people think..

some of my friends ever said to me.." it's so hard to predict the way i am thinking "
sometimes i look quiet but i have a lot of mind in my head...
Some people said to me..i look happy but actually i am sad and in pain inside--

when i listen to this one..i am smiling..and didn't reply anything..

actually the answer is a BIG No.. haha

today i like to tell some story about me..
since i was small..the things that i always remember and interesting is about " Life "
i like to sit alone and look around me..seeing people talking..smiling..laughing..playing..
it is fun..i always enjoy that moment..

don't you think this earth is beautiful?every single breath we take bring a good past story..
do you know what the most interesting things for me when i am sitting up there?
When i can met someone with different beautiful eyes in the way they looking at this life...
something i called " True colors shining trough "

it is fun to understand about people and Life..
to be honest, it is quite difficult to find people who really love about life..
yes..it's really hard..

a bunch people shouted out there " I love this Life "...
but that is not what i see trough their eyes..
80% that i found is someone who pretend to be happy..

all i can see is some regret for this life..

everybody will think i am stupid..
but that is what i found when i am sitting up there and enjoying this life..
When i look at people , and i really can't find any True colors shining trough..

People is also said to me.. Why i need to do that? sitting and waste your time to watch at people and try to understand them?
out there a bunch of people who just care their selves..they always change..." aaa you just waste your time...better think of your own selves"

but that is my Hobby..haha
that's why there are some people told me that i kind of people who got a lot of mind inside my head to think..
actually that is not..
i am just enjoying my Hobby when i am sitting in a spare time..



for me..to find someone that you can trust, don't decide from the way he/she talk and behave,
but you need to see trough that true colors in one people eyes -- that true colors is hard to see.. it is like a rainbow just come out once a time..


What is a True Colors?
for me all people True Colors is a Kindness..

yeah..that is what i see for a long time..
Kindness is all people True Colors..

in this earth.. People actually pretend to be bad and suddenly cover their kindness..
when the first time they born..
all of they know is a compassion and kindness ..
but when people are growing up..
the more people grow up..the more they afraid of life..and suddenly choose to be bad..
the more they near themselves with a bad environment..
and then the result becoming bad..

Why i can said that..
long time ago..because i had lost a lot of my friend out there..

actually i can see their true colors of kindness..
but they choose to cover it with a Stupidity of being afraid with Reality...

you know..sometimes they act like a bunch of Shit..
they done something unbelievable wrong, although we tried hard to stop it before being worse..

but when you do something sincerely for them..for a minutes their eyes is looking at you and stop for a while..like seeing some light in a darkness..

because that is what people True Colors ..
everybody wish to be happy, full with love and care..

only some people is chosen a wrong way to get that true meaning of being Happy..and still do not know yet..

That is what i see..

A true Colors inside people..
A beautiful things...like a rainbow..